her books were confiscated & other tales of dangerous work ♥

This Woman's Hand 

A Special Address

We had no idea what the war was all about but one thing we did know: 

under no circumstances were we to talk honestly about what we were thinking or feeling.

A lover who is leaving at dawn announces that he has to find his fan and his paper. "I know I put them somewhere last night," he says.  Since it is pitch dark, he gropes about the room, he bumps into the furniture muttering, "Strange! Where on Earth could they be?" Finally he discovers the objects. He thrusts the paper into his breast of his robe with a great rustling sound; then he snaps open his fan and busily fans away with it. Only now he is ready to take his leave. 
 What charmless behavior.  
"Hateful" is an understatement.

A good lover will behave elegantly at dawn as at any other time. 
 He drags himself out of bed with a look of dismay on his face. 
 The lady urges him on: "Come my friend, it's getting light. 

 You don't want anyone to find you here,” He gives a deep sigh, as to say

the night had not been nearly long enough, and that it is an agony to leave.  

Once up, he does not instantly pull on his trousers.  Instead he comes close to the lady and he whispers whatever was left unsaid during the night.  

Even when he is dressed, he still lingers, vaguely pretending to be fastening his sash.

Presently he raises the lattice, and the two lovers stand together, 

by the side door while he tells her how he dreads the coming day, which will keep them apart;

 then he slips away.  The lady watches him go, and at
this moment of parting will remain among her most charming memories.

Indeed 

one's attachment to a man 
depends largely on the elegance of his leave-taking. 

When he jumps out of bed, scurries about the room, tightly fastens his trouser sash, rolls up the sleeves of his court cloak, over robe, or hunting costume, stuffs his belongings into the breast of his robe and then briskly secures his outer sash - 

one really begins to hate him, 

(The Pillow Book, 49-50).

The position a wife held vis-a-vis her husband's other wives was determined by a number of factors, including her fathers prominence, her own intelligence and education, and the number of worthy children she bore.  It was on the basis of such factors that

her position as wife was established, 

Similarly,

wives had the right to judge a husband

 based on his merits, and

they were free to leave him 

and marry someone more powerful or more successful,

if they so desired.